Heartslinked

November 15, 2012

1991 reliving my past

Filed under: Uncategorized — by jeannette4175 @ 5:44 pm

When I was 15 I met this girl in my sophomore year of high school, I’m going to call her K.  We quickly became great friends.  I thought she was so cool.  She was dating a guy that was 20 and had his own place, he had a car and everything.  She was sweet honestly.  We both had dreams and goals beyond high school.  She grew up in a 2 parent household like me but we both had a few bumps in our lives.  We met at our continuation high school.  I was there for skipping classes my freshmen year.  I was back on track for school though.  Even though I did not have enough credits to be a freshmen at the beginning of my sophomore year by the end of my sophomore I was on track to graduate a year early.  I had put in the work that I needed.  I found teachers that truly cared about us students.  They cared not just about how we did in school but how we did in life.  I needed that at the time.  My friend K introduced me to her boyfriend’s best friend in February 1991.  That was Allysa’s dad.  Rob was 20 at the time, he lived with his parents, didn’t graduate high school, and didn’t work.  None of that bothered me at all.  This guy was older and interested in little tiny me. He made me feel special and important.  He had dreams of being in a rock band, how cool is that? 

By May K had found out she was pregnant.  Her and her boyfriend were going strong.  She found a way to finish high school just a month after her child would be born, a year and a half early she finished high school.  They were going to get married.  She would be moving in with him too.  Theirs was a fairy tale in my head at the time.  But I knew that would never happen to me ever. 

I just wouldn’t be the girl that got pregnant in high school.  I was too smart for that.  One month later right after high school was let out for the summer and right before summer school started I found out I was pregnant.  Crap holy crap what was I going to do?  This is real and scary.  I knew that I would not abort.  I also knew that I loved this baby and I would parent, know matter what I would parent and never place.  I knew way deep down Rob was not everything I had hoped for in a husband, spouse, father of my child but he never hit me so we could work it out, I figured. 

That was my thinking then. Honestly I knew I had faith enough in myself that I could make it and I would bring Rob around to be the person both my child and I needed.  I figured he would find a job soon.  He would get a place of his own soon. It would work out.  I would make sure of it because I had to protect my child.  My child needed both of her parents. 

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